I know I need to fix something but I dont know what. What should I change?

It's called "Where do I belong" should I change the title too?

Lost alone stuck in the woods,

With the whispers of trees as your only company,

The lie lurking over,

The jolts of pain locked in your leg,

The lonesome nights end to end

The intense moon as your only light,

To find your way out of the dark,

Look for the Gold,

As Love is your friend,

Your lostness will soon come to an end.

Question

English

Jamiya Ellison

22 May, 14:20

I know I need to fix something but I dont know what. What should I change?

It's called "Where do I belong" should I change the title too?

Lost alone stuck in the woods,

With the whispers of trees as your only company,

The lie lurking over,

The jolts of pain locked in your leg,

The lonesome nights end to end

The intense moon as your only light,

To find your way out of the dark,

Look for the Gold,

As Love is your friend,

Your lostness will soon come to an end.

+3

Answers (1)

Know the Answer?

Daisy Bush · Answer 1

I don't think that the poems needs more things, but I do think that you should change the title, I don't really know to what though. The poem is beautifulx100, I love this part "the intense moon as your only light, to find your way out of the dark", the ending was beautiful, there was no hope but you still somehow made the poem sound not hopeless.